The French on British cooking: If it's cold, it's soup; if it's warm, it's beer. Keep warm in the winter with these great soups. POTATO AND CHEESE SOUP INGREDIENTS 1 Tbsp. butter 1 onion, chopped 2-3 cloves garlic, finely chopped or minced 5 medium potato, peeled and diced 2 cups chicken stock 1/4 tsp. dried thyme 2 cups milk Salt and pepper to taste 1 cup grated sharp cheddar cheese 1 tbsp. chopped fresh parsley (optional) METHOD Melt butter in large pot. Add onion and garlic. SautZ 3-4 minutes. Add potatoes, chicken stock, thyme, salt and pepper. Bring to a boil then turn heat down to medium and cook for 20 minutes or until potatoes are very tender. Remove half of potatoes and place in a food processor. Puree. Return to pot. Add milk and heat thoroughly. Add more salt and pepper to taste. Stir in cheese and cook gently until cheese melts. Garnish with parsley flakes when serving. APPLE PARSNIP SOUP INGREDIENTS lb. of Butter 1 White Onion, diced 15 Parsnips, peeled and large dice 5 Apples, peeled and large diced 1 Can Apple Juice, 46 oz. 1 Pint Heavy Cream 6 oz. Honey Chicken Stock - about 1 qt., you need enough to cover vegetables Kosher Salt Ground white pepper METHOD Over medium flame, melt butter in heavy sauce pan, about 4 qt pot. SautZ onions until translucent. Add apple juice and reduce until half. Add parsnips and chicken stock and cover. Cook until parsnips are fully cooked and then add apples. Cook for 2 minutes and then puree soup until smooth. Reduce on low heat. Stir occasionally as not to burn soup. When finished, add heavy cream and honey. Season with salt and pepper, the soup should coat the back of a wooden spoon. AND FINALLY ... Old Perceval decided to treat himself for his 100th birthday. So he flew first-class to San Francisco and checked into the Fairmont Hotel. The mischievous hotel concierge got an idea and, as a practical joke, sent a call girl up to his room. She knocked, and the old fellow walked slowly over and opened the door. He saw a beautiful red-headed woman standing before him. "I have a birthday present for you," she said, and smiled. She leaned forward and whispered, "I'm here to give you super sex." "Thanks," he said thoughtfully. "I'll take the soup." Chef Gilligan