Seriously, does China think we are really that stupid? Do they honestly think we are that completely brain-dead that they can just ram another human steroid down our throats and we won’t notice them smashing World records like they were Tibetan protests? The Olympics are off to a fine start by all accounts however China seem determined to wipe the shine off the five famous rings, and has apparently learnt nothing from being caught doping on several occasions recently.

In 2009 five junior Chinese swimmers were banned after testing positive for the anabolic agent clenbuterol at the 2008 national junior championships. In 1994 China ‘dominated’ the Rome world championships, when its drug-riddled women ‘won’ 13 of the 16 available golds, and were subsequently banned by all World swimming federations.

Basically, China has priors.

Well, apparently they think we aren’t watching or perhaps they think we have the memory retention of your average goldfish, as they are clearly at it again. Chinese ‘swimmer’  Ye Shiwen won the 400m IM gold in a world record time of 4min 28.43sec with a final 50m where she was quicker than none other than Ryan Lochte, who himself won the men's 400m IM in the second-fastest time in history.

Let’s spell that out for all and sundry.

China thinks we are going to believe that a 16 year old called Ye Shiwen won the 400m fair and square in a time that bested Ryan Lochte’s, which in turn was the second fastest time in history.

The Chinese girl clocked 28.93secs for the last 50m compared to the 27 year-olds 29.10secs while she also nearly beat his time for the last 100m at 58.68secs compared to 58.65secs when he raced just minutes earlier. Her ridiculous last two lengths would have also beaten Michael Phelps, before Lochte, the fastest man in that event.

In case you think this is an isolated incident, China won more gold medals in the pool on the first day than it did during the entire Olympics in Beijing four years ago.

Thankfully the worlds various swimming organisations have all expressed serious reservations about this insane ‘achievement’ and will be monitoring the test results of the Chinese teams steroid checks. The swimming bodies can hold on to those results for 8 years, and they believe that any masking agents or other chemicals will eventually be figured out, allowing them to find anything hidden deep in the molecular breakdown of the results.

Then, we will know the truth, and hopefully China will be banned from competing in International swimming until they finally stop cheating.

Then, or when this 16 year old Frankenstein develops an Adams apple and a penis.

That, either.

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