Regional jokes are part of the staple of Irish life, pitting country folk against city slickers and smart alecks against native wit.
Here are the top ten we have compiled:
People from this county are allegedly especially flinty and careful with their money.
- Where does a Cavan father bring his kids on Christmas Eve?
To Santa’s grave.
- Why does a Cavan man get married in a farmyard? So the hens can eat the rice.
- How was the Grand Canyon formed? A Cavan man dropped a nickel down a rabbit hole.
- A Cavan man and his wife were at the fair and a pilot was offering a free flight to anyone who would stay quiet while he did loop the loops in the small plane. If they screamed it would cost $50.
- The Cavan couple climbed on board and the pilot did his worst to complete silence from the back of the plane.
- Finally, he landed and he complimented the Cavan man on the two-way radio for staying quiet.
“Ah now, I nearly shouted when the wife fell out," the Cavan man replied.
Ireland’s smartest rural county with a reputation for cleverness.
Question asked of a Kerry man:
- “Is it true when you ask a Kerry man a question he answers by asking another?
Kerry man: “Who told you that”?
- The Kerry man told his friend he’d invented a spaceship to go to the sun:
“But you’ll burn up its way too hot.”
“No problem we’ll go at night,” the Kerry man replied.
- Two Kerry men got lost on a dark night and stumbled into a graveyard.
“Where the hell are we,” said one.
“No problem I know by this signpost,” said the other looking at a gravestone, “it says 'Miles from Dublin'”
- An unpopular Kerry man died and the priest could get no one to say a kind word. Eventually, after an awkward silence, a little man at the back of the church volunteered and said. “His brother was worse”
- Cork people are said to have high opinions of themselves as in “Help, help, my son the doctor is drowning.”
- A brick on a Cork man’s head is called “an extension.”
*Originally published in 2013. Updated in April 2022.