Grief takes many forms. "In a Bad Way" provides a stage for a striking performance by playwright Isolde Fenton.
She insists she is ill and seeks her doctor’s advice. However, she is also quick to offer advice herself: “I’ve personally stalked his personal Twitter account – surely, a healthcare provider should be on private?” She longs for a definitive diagnosis to explain why she feels unwell.
Fenton suspects something is wrong. Is she simply a hypochondriac with a touch of OCD? Six visits to the doctor in a month – is that excessive?
She also muses, “Been meaning to ask the Doctor if there’s an illness wrapped in silliness that makes it uneasy for me to answer texts willingly.” Her backstory gradually reveals clues to her anxieties.
An only and lonely child, Fenton recalls the warmth of her mother. They bonded over "Desperate Housewives," particularly the character Bree – “the gorgeous ginger, not the cheese.” Her affection for the show runs so deep that she name-checks the theme’s composer, Danny Elfman, who also wrote "The Simpsons" theme. These fond memories both comfort and haunt her after her mother’s passing.
While at college, Fenton and her roommate, Jenny, form a close bond, but tragedy strikes when her Mammy dies. Away from home and struggling with the sudden independence of college life, she does not cope well. She clings to an emotionally distant boyfriend, overindulges, and sabotages her friendship with Jenny. A bit of a mess.
These memories resurface in the doctor’s office, where she is eventually given a diagnosis that is not “bum cancer, blood clots, dehydration, diabetes, endometriosis, dehydration, diabetes … arm amputation.” The real diagnosis is unexpected: “I have anxiety. Oh F*** me.”
The play’s simple staging – a table, a chair, a black background – perfectly mirrors the insidious subtlety of grief. Shifts in lighting signal her descent into inner turmoil. She cries: “Some things are not right, something is never right, my skin upon skin feels wrong and too tight, I’m stuck in this flesh prison, thoughts running faster than my blood, I’m not craz,y I’m not ditzy, I’m not wrong …” Music then gently lifts Fenton’s spirits, offering hope and relief.
All the elements of this 60-minute play – acting, script, staging, lighting, and sound – are finely balanced. The result is a moving, deeply human performance.
"In a Bad Way" was presented as part of the Play // Time chapter of the Dublin Fringe Festival at The Lir Academy – Studio 2.
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