On Christmas morning all over Ireland, there will be countless people thanking their lucky stars. Not because they're looking forward to presents or Christmas dinner, although I’m sure both are appealing. No, rather it is because they know that once Christmas arrives they no longer have to suffer the wrath of a vicious Twelve Pubs of Christmas hangover. Santacon may be turning many places in the US into a drunken mess this weekend, but as per usual, the Irish come out on top in terms of how to properly have the craic this Christmas time.
The Twelve Pubs of Christmas is a now yearly tradition in Ireland that has taken the country by storm in the past ten years or so. Originally only the most dedicated of drinkers would take on the difficult task, but more and more we’re seeing all sorts of Christmas parties join the fray – from office parties big and small to friends and family reunions. For some unlucky souls out there, this means they could be in for two or three rounds of the Twelve Pubs before December is out.
For anyone not familiar with the Twelve Pubs of Christmas, it is essentially an extended bar crawl. Over the course of an evening you, along with your brothers and sisters-in-indulgence, visit twelve bars and attempt to have a drink in every one.
“Christmas jumpers” or sweaters and Santa hats are the uniform of choice for the soldiers of the Twelve Pubs and every weekend in December you will see drunk Santa Clauses and Mrs. Clauses in every town in Ireland.
Anyone who thinks that the hardest thing about the night is to drink twelve pints should think again – it is abiding by all of the different rules in each pub that is the true challenge. The rules of the Twelve Pubs vary from one group to another, but all are surely in agreement that it is the rules that create all of the fun and the mischief on the night. A common list of rules for the 12 Pubs would include:
1. No drinking with your right hand in the first pub.
2. No pointing at people in the second pub.
3. No talking to anyone you know in the third pub.
4. No standing, resting or leaning in the fourth pub.
5. No using the restroom in the fifth pub … and so on and so forth.
There is a penalty of gulping down a large amount of your drink upon breaking any given rule. There is usually a maximum limit of 30 minutes per pub and a designated rule keeper with a whistle to keep the group on track. Of course the further into the night you go, the harder it can be to enforce the rules or time limit. Nearly every Twelve Pubs this author has ever attended has usually ended with a happy consensus to stay put around bar number six or seven, with fellow Twelve Pubs-goers only too happy to enjoy the craic and merriment in the bar rather than brave the cold, rainy December weather in search of another. There have been a few times that all twelve bars were visited, and for anyone who has managed to reach pub number 12 they know it is a badge of both honor and shame.
Undoubtedly the Twelve Pubs of Christmas is not the healthiest of ways to spend a December evening and sure it does play into stereotypes about Irish drinking habits, but I think in many ways that these criticisms miss the point of these kinds of events. The Twelve Pubs should be viewed as a once (or twice) a year occasion, to mark the passing of another year, and share in each other's company around a special time of year. A Twelve Pubs night is one that is always full of laughter and funny stories; it is a night of excess sure, but also one of great merriment.
So three cheers to the Irish tradition of the Twelve Pubs of Christmas … and thank God it only comes round for one month a year!
* Originally published in December 2014.