WHAT a week. Gold medals galore for Michael Phelps. Witness to the most sensational run by Usain Bolt in the 100 meter final. Ringside when Ireland's boxers are guaranteed two bronze medals at the very worst.

It may be four o'clock in the morning as I finalize this column in my Beijing hotel room, not a million miles from the Bird's Nest stadium, but for the first time in a long time I am not looking for your sympathy.

Instead, for the first time in a long time, I finally understand what all the fuss is about when it comes to the Olympics.

The buzz started when the American reporters around us in the massive media center - it seems bigger than Croke Park - first got excited about your man Phelps and his plans to break the Mark Spitz record of seven gold medals in the one games.

Day by day, event by event, Phelps started to live up to his promise. Day by day, edition by edition, the American hacks and their colleagues all over the world took more and more notice.

By Saturday night the ticket office in the media center had a simple sign telling anyone looking for swim tickets to see Phelps smash the Spitz record on Sunday morning to forget it.

The venue, like whatever pocket Phelps keeps his medals in, was bulging to capacity.

So was the Bird's Nest on Saturday night when Bolt smashed his own world record and ran the 100 meters final in just 9.69 seconds.

It was the most breathtaking sports event I have probably ever been lucky enough to witness and, believe me, this was the one event I wanted to see in Beijing.

I know people have serious doubts about the integrity of this race - four of the last five winners have subsequently tested positive or something to that effect - but to see a man run at that speed was just something else.

To see him lift his head some seven strides from home, assume victory and practically just jog the rest of the way to the line was actually frightening.

The race was over almost before it had begun, but to see that stadium rise to Bolt was just unforgettable.

By Monday night the emotions and the attentions had turned Irish as Paul Hession proved that white Irishmen can sprint as he won his quarterfinal in the 200 meter event.

By Tuesday night his race was run and his dream of a place in the final demolished, but no one should underestimate the Hession achievement in even getting close to an Olympic sprint final.

Anyway, by Tuesday night we had other eggs to fry, other songs to sing as Dubliner Kenny Egan and Belfast's Paddy Barnes won through to the quarterfinals of boxing's light heavyweight and light fly divisions respectively.

In the process they guaranteed themselves bronze medals at worst going into Friday night's semifinals, a welcome relief after all the disappointments in so many other arenas for the Irish at these games.

As the "Ole Ole Oles" rang around the Worker's Gymnasium in downtown Beijing, it felt good to be Irish and great to be at these games.

Sometimes, just sometimes, I do actually love my job. This is most definitely one of those sometimes.

By the way, the tank that first appeared outside my hotel in last week's column has disappeared and nobody has told us why. Not that the Chinese told us why it appeared in the first place either!

A Bolt of Guinness!

OLYMPIC sprint sensation Usain Bolt is a secret Guinness drinker thanks to his Irish manager Ricky Simms -- and he plans to unwind at the end of the Olympics with a few pints of plain. The fastest man in the world is managed by Donegal native Simms, who has already been sampling the best Guinness in Beijing.

Simms, a former Finn Valley runner from Ballybofey, was in Paddy O'Shea's Irish pub to celebrate his man's new world record last Saturday night.

Bolt has China in his hands and the world at his feet after he won the 100 meter final in a record time of just 9.69 seconds.

His father Wellesley claimed afterwards that his son's victory was down to his fondness for the Jamaican grown Yam vegetable.

But Simms has revealed here in Beijing that Bolt is also partial to a pint of plain as he looks forward to a multi-million windfall from his new status as Olympic champion.

And local Guinness fans are keeping their fingers crossed that Bolt follows Simms' lead when he wraps up his record Olympic haul after Saturday's sprint relay finals.

Regulars at Paddy O'Shea's are praying that Simms can persuade their man to drop in on Saturday night when his Olympics comes to an end.

Ballybofey-born Simms is one of the top athletics agents in the world with Bolt his star client.

The Paddy O'Shea's pub has become a Mecca for Irish athletes and fans here for the Beijing games.

Several members of the Irish team were there on Saturday night for the Dublin-Tyrone GAA game after their own Olympics had come to an end, including canoeist Eoin Rheinisch and several Irish rowers.

Sports Minister Martin Cullen was in the pub on Sunday night to watch his native county Waterford beat Tipperary in the All-Ireland hurling semifinal.

He was joined by former GAA president Sean Kelly and RTE personalities Des Cahill and Colm Murray. And a good time was had by one and all.

Sideline Views

I KNOW this is embarrassing but yes, the wife Liz has a toy poodle, Petal. She's even been in the house for more years than the three kids. Petal that is. And I have news for Petal, she could become an Olympian.

Back at the Paris Olympics in 1900, poodle clipping was an event. I kid you not. Avril Lafoule, a French farmer's wife, won the gold medal by clipping 17 poodles in less than two hours.

They did some very strange things in 1900. Pigeon shooting was also an Olympic sport that year -- with real live pigeons.

Bring back the poodle clipping I say. Anyone brave enough to cut 17-year-old Petal's hair deserves a medal . . .

AMERICAN swimming sensation Michael Phelps let his big Olympic secret out of the bag in Beijing. In between breaking world records and winning gold medals he eats 12,000 calories a day and sleeps.

"I'm eating a lot of pasta and pizza," he said. "I'm eating a lot of carbs and sleeping as much as I can."

Anxious to improve Ireland's medal haul in the pool, I am going to follow the Phelps mantra religiously. There's only one small problem. I can't swim! . . .

NO Ireland soccer team has ever qualified for an Olympic Games but senior goalkeeper Shay Given is here in spirit. The Irish here have discovered that something sounding like Shay Shay is the Chinese for thank you. So some of them have been saying "Shay Shay Given" to the bemused locals every time they want to say thanks! . . .

A GRAND total of 17 Chinese table tennis players played for other countries at the Beijing Olympics, including one who was brave enough to appear for that sporting non entity Luxemburg. Surely we could entice one of them to play for Ireland! . . .

NICE quote from Irish boxer Darren Sutherland before he went off for a mandatory dope test after his first win of the Olympics last Saturday. "They might think I'm on something but it's only Irish porridge," laughed the Dubliner . . .

SONIA O'Sullivan reportedly wants to run the marathon at the London games in 2012 -- when she'll be 42. I know plenty of fortysomethings who would be happy just to think about running any marathon, never mind an Olympic one.

HEROES OF THE WEEK

MICHAEL Phelps for his incredible eight gold medals, or Usain Bolt for his unbelievable stroll to the 100 meter crown in the Bird's Nest stadium last Saturday night? Neither actually. Boxers Kenny Egan and Paddy Barnes won Ireland's first medals of these Games on Tuesday night with truly heroic quarterfinal wins that guarantee them bronze at worst. Once again the boxers did the trick. Ireland has only ever won 22 Olympic medals -- and 11 of them have come from the noble art!

IDIOTS OF THE WEEK

THE Chinese government tried to tell us on Monday that of the 77 requests to protest at the Olympic Games 74 were withdrawn amicably, two were suspended and one was illegal. Right. These games have been brilliant, don't get me wrong, and Beijing has been a wonderful host city, but do the authorities here really take us for idiots? Probably.