Dear MTN,

I am in a very bad relationship with a man I've been with for ten years. He wants to get married, but he is abusive and I am having a hard enough time in breaking up with him now, without any papers legally binding me to him. I know he doesn't want to change, in fact he doesn't think he is wrong. He says I make him mad and that it is my fault. I know he only wants to marry me to control me more and thinks I'll be too afraid to divorce him since I am Catholic.

I really need your help. I would like to join your service, in your new Westchester office, but I don't know how to break up with him first. Please give me any advice you can. I am 30 years old and would love to find Mr. Right, get married and one day have a child. Do you think it's possible? - Lea

Dear Lea,

Yes it is possible to be happy and in a healthy relationship! You need to take some very important steps first to get to your end goal, marriage and a child. The first step is to recognize you are in an unhealthy relationship, realize it is not your fault, and end it. You are half way there. I suggest you call the police and get a restraining order since you mentioned he has abused you.

Once you get that order of protection, you can date freely without the fear that men like that try to inflict. Yes you can come into our Westchester office and have a free, private consultation. Just call 516-444-2861 and schedule your appointment. We will do the rest!

I am very proud that you are taking the necessary steps to get out of an abusive relationship. You can and will do it. Unfortunately many woman and even men stay in these unhealthy relationships because they think they cannot leave; but they can. The key is to ask a love one or friend for help.

Once you make this decision, there is no turning back. Please remember an abusive man will do and say anything to keep you. He will tell you he will change. He will threaten you if you leave him. He will tell you that "no man will ever love you like I do." These are all lies, and unless he admits he has a problem, and goes to years of therapy, he will eventually go back to his "old ways."

Life is too short not to be in Love. If anyone is in this type of relationship, call us today and we can help you! Thank you for being brave and we look forward to helping you find a kind, successful, and loving man. - MTN