The 25-year-old singer – who lost her first child with boyfriend Sam Cooper when she was six months pregnant last November – admitted the tragedy has changed her as a person and she has struggled to come to terms with what happened
She said: "It was a really long battle – and I think that kind of thing changes a person."
The 'Smile' hitmaker has also spoke out about her struggle with eating disorder bulimia, confessing she used to make herself vomit after meals.
Speaking on new three-part Channel 4 TV show 'Lily Allen: From Riches To Rags', she explained: "I used to vomit after meals. It’s not something I'm proud of. But, I tell you what, a lot of people came up to me telling me how great I looked and I'd be on the cover of every magazine.
"I thought I looked good and it was great to be able to try on clothes and feel a million dollars. But I wasn't happy, I really wasn't. I would love to be the skinniest person in the world but I can't do that without being unhappy – I like food." Lily is on a self-imposed break from the music industry and admits the thought of being a pop star in 25 years' time is her "idea of hell".
She added: "People who are famous and successful and live in this mad world tend to die really early, or kill themselves or die in a drugs overdose. I'd rather not so I figure I will go and eat.
"My idea of hell would be doing this in 25 years' time. I don't want to be like Madonna – look at her, she's mental. No offence but that is not what drives me. I want to get married and have kids and make sandwiches cutting the crusts off."
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