Hey Marky Mark, that ringing sound in your ears is the Clue Phone calling you.
 
Irish American screen star Mark Wahlberg said he turned down a role in Brokeback Mountain on the advice of his parish priest.
 
'I met with Ang Lee on that movie, I read 15 pages of the script and got a little creeped out,' Wlahberg told the press. 'It was very graphic, descriptive - the spitting on the hand, getting ready to do the thing.'
 
'I told Ang Lee, 'I like you, you're a talented guy, if you want to talk about it more...' Thankfully, he didn't...I didn't rush to see Brokeback, it's just not my deal... Obviously, it was done in taste - look how it was received.'
 
It's called acting, Mark. It's make believe. No one was going to make you do the icky gay stuff that you're taking so much trouble to describe in graphic detail and then cringe about in print.
 
This week the National Enquirer reports that Wahlberg turned down the role on the advice of his priest:
 
"The 38-year-old reformed bad boy relies on his closest confidante and longtime religious mentor, the Rev. James Flavin, to help him pick and choose his parts. 'Mark is a practicing Catholic, and he never makes a final decision on a starring role until Father Flavin gives his OK,' an insider revealed to The Enquirer.
 
'Mark says he owes his career to Father Flavin. 'Father Flavin pushes Mark to honor his religious roots,' said the source. 'Even though Mark was offered one of the leads in Brokeback Mountain, he passed because of the gay subject matter, which clashes with Catholic doctrine.'
 
So now Catholic doctrine is saying its a sin to even pretend to be gay? Wow that's comprehensive. It's also really, really hypocritical.
 
Because, of course, playing a coke and meth-addicted hustler with a 10-inch you know what in Boogie Nights was just fine. Nothing objectionable about that. No doubt Father Flavin gave him the go-ahead. And let's not forget it was walking around in his underwear onstage at every opportunity that made him famous (as a gay pin-up, among other things).
 
Irony much?
 
Does Wahlberg have a pendant around his neck that reads: 'In case of accident, call for a priest?' It sure sounds like it.
 
Maybe try thinking for yourself, Mark. You used to back in the old days.