Ah, the sheer shame of being 'slagged' (aka roasted) by an Irish person.
There's no secret that Irish people have a way with language. We're not just talking about Heaney, Beckett, Wilde, or Joyce - or anyone from the so-called 'national of storytellers' either.
Rather, we mean the way an Irish person can manage to insult you in the most endearing of manners. Like the way in Ireland "I will yeah" means "no I absolutely will not," so, too, are the common put-downs downright confusing to anyone from outside the country.
Twitter user Ciara Nic Sheáin took to the social network to gather the ultimate Irish roasts.
Ok today’s thread: what’s your favourite Irish insult that’s usually quite amusing and acceptable
Eg: “still has his communion money in the credit union” when calling someone cheap— Ciara Nic Sheáin (@Ciara87C) September 6, 2018
We were truly doubled over when we saw some of the tongue-in-cheek responses.
Here are some of our favorites - and naturally, we've included necessary translations too.
"If there was work in the bed, he'd lie on the floor" - aka, he is lazy.
"He/she knows just about enough not to ate himself/herself" - aka, he/she is stupid.
"Do you think I came up the lough in a bubble" - aka, do you think I was born yesterday?
"Ye couldn't like him if ye rared him" - aka, he is not a very likable person.
"She'd catch the bouquet at a funeral" - aka, she is attention seeking.
"He'd peel an orange in his pocket" - aka, he is not very generous.
"She’d go down your throat for news” - aka, she is very nosey.
"She has awful notions of herself" - aka, she is very vain.
"If he was made of chocolate, he'd eat himself" - aka, he is very vain.
“If you told him you were away to Tenerife, he’d say he was going to Elevenerife” - aka, he is always trying to get one up.
"Scarlet for your ma for having ya," - aka, you're an embarrassment to your mother/family.
“They’re fur coat no knickers,” - aka, they care more about what people think then their morals.
"He’d get up on himself if he could turn around quick enough,” - aka, he is very vain.
"Would you steal my grave as quick?" - aka, how dare you take my seat as soon as I get up.
"He's that tight he has a fork in the sugar jar," - aka, he is not very generous.
"I wouldn't ride him into battle," - aka, he is not very pleasing to the eye.
"The tide wouldn't take her out," - aka, she is not very attractive.
"If he fell in a river he'd come out with a fish in his mouth," aka, he always lands on his feet.
"If he turned sideways he’d fall through a crack in the road," aka he is very thin.
Do you have any more for us? Be sure to leave them in the comments section, below.
Read More: Top Irish insults when you just can't even