We really don't thank elderly conservative men enough for protecting our society. So let us repair now to the all-male smoking room at Fox News where four elderly male conservative pundits are shielding us from the selfishness of working mothers.
Yes, it's another episode of Lou Dobbs Tonight and the learned fellows are courageously addressing an issue that poses a bigger threat to the nation than gun background checks or gay marriage: you guessed it, they're discussing working mothers.
Everyone knows the growing danger posed to society by these uppity women, but kudos to these gents for having the cojones to admit it.
Reacting to the latest Pew study which shows that women are now the sole or primary breadwinners in four out of ten households with children, Dobbs and his appalled guests agreed that it was a complete catastrophe for America.
Juan Williams, looking like he just been roused from a fitful slumber, opined that 'something' was going 'terribly wrong in American society, and it's hurting our children, and it's going to have impact for generations to come.'
That 'something' was women acting like sexual equality was a reality. That baffled and upset him. Fellow guest and Viking values protector Erick Erickson suggested that women working was a downright repudiation of nature itself.
'When you look at biology, look at the natural world, the roles of a male and a female in society, and other animals, the male typically is the dominant role. The female, it's not antithesis, or it's not competing, it's a complementary role. We as people in a smart society have lost the ability to have complementary relationships in nuclear families, and it's tearing us apart.'
Williams nodded. 'The politicians won't say it,' he said. 'They won't admit this!'
And the women themselves won't admit this, or at least we must assume so, since none were invited to appear.
I'm sure Dobbs and his panel of intellectual titans will agree with me that the real rot set in with the disastrous decision to allow women to vote. That led, in short order, to the widespread belief that their political opinions were of some consequence, and that they might even have a say in the life of the nation (and indeed, in their own lives). This is how it starts.
It's interesting to watch men who regularly urinate on science from a great height - climate change? bunk! - evolution is a satanic myth - stem cell research is a demonic obscenity - suddenly become believers in biology and anthropology when it seems to agree with them (although it actually doesn't).
In the past election cycle much was made of Mitt Romney's confession he had 'binders full of women' candidates he consulted to bring some gender balance since his cabinet as Governor of Massachusetts seemed inordinately full of men.
I don't suppose he realized he was destroying America with his unnatural social experiments. Thank goodness for the Lou Dobbs Tonight show then, to remind ourselves that the backbone of the GOP know whats best for men and women are not afraid to legislate for it too.
It's for your own good ladies. Now, where's our dinner, eh?