Pub GuideCan love be apolitical?
Posted on Thursday, October 14, 2010 at 01:28 PM
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I am in my fifties and after a long time mourning my wife, I have begun a relationship of late with an old friend. So far so good, we enjoy each other’s company and we both share our beloved Irish roots, something I think that really sealed us together. I like everything about her, and at my age this doesn’t happen regularly!
So I hate to be pessimistic, but I have one complaint that sometimes can overshadow the good. We are polar opposites politically! I am a conservative and have been all my life. I am a proud member of the Tea Party and I stand true to my conservative beliefs. It’s how I’ve been all my life.
She, on the other hand, is a flaming liberal! She is in a dream world when it comes to voters issues, and when the subjects come up (we try to suppress them) it ends badly. The time of year, the media and meeting fellow party members doesn’t help, and at the end of the day it’s impossible to avoid discussing and arguing.
We both agree on one thing – that we will never agree with the opposing viewpoints!
So, Colleen, my question to you is; can two people, of completely different viewpoints on important issues in life, be together in harmony? Or will it eventually break us? I have a lot to lose at this stage of my life, but I just can’t fathom some of her views.
Thanks.
Mike, Texas.
Well Mike,
Sounds like the good points outweigh the bad regarding this lady.
Are either of you aggressive about your viewpoints? If not, that’s great.
If so, then you need to think long and hard about this. One of you could be a ticking bomb inside and explode one day in the form of a major argument where hurtful things are said.
These issues are contentious, and like us all, you need to learn to respect other people’s opinions that aren’t like yours. After all, that is America in a nutshell.
But that’s easier said than done and if it bugs you enough to think less of her, yell or even keep you awake at night, then it’s not worth it, and ultimately she isn’t either.
But I think in every relationship you need tolerance, so this is where you need it. Focus on the things you do agree on – that you enjoy being together and that Irish Americans rule!
Colleen.
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GaelicPrince | Nov 10, 2010, 04:23 PM EST
@Monsoonman Looks shouldn't have anything to do with personallity. It's a big bonus factor though!
One question away from this post. Anyone in Ireland know of any mail-order-brides? No one understands my situation when it comes around to women. Everytime I walk up to a lady and try my best, a dutch looser walks up behind her and whispers something in her ear and she looses all interest in me. I always wanted to marry a freedom fighter! A contact in the IRA perhaps?
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MarthaAnne | Oct 21, 2010, 01:49 PM EDT
DennisQ,
I agree that he needs to get over himself.
He's the one in the dream world.
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MarthaAnne | Oct 21, 2010, 01:47 PM EDT
I could NEVER marry someone who was my polar opposite politically. I mean, one of the great things in my marriage is that we can talk about what we care about, and ACT on them, too. We could not do that in such comfort if we were so different politically.
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DennisQ | Oct 18, 2010, 11:26 PM EDT
Dear Mike from Texas,
If you're like most so-called "conservatives" you assume that you see the world the way it actually is, and that people who are left of center live in a dream world. Unfortunately for you, you're wrong about that, and it will cost you a relationship to comfort you in your advancing years.
It's not too late to get over yourself. You don't have to agree with her political viewpoints, but you don't have to believe that she has it all wrong.
To be quite candid with you, it sounds like your lady friend is too good for you. You know it, and she knows it. So you've made up a story about irreconciliable political differences. But don't despair - you're not necessarily headed to a lonely old age because of your stubbornness. Go to a Tea Party rally; you'll meet a nice widow there who thinks cutting taxes is just the thing to do.
If you're like most so-called "conservatives" you assume that you see the world the way it actually is, and that people who are left of center live in a dream world. Unfortunately for you, you're wrong about that, and it will cost you a relationship to comfort you in your advancing years.
It's not too late to get over yourself. You don't have to agree with her political viewpoints, but you don't have to believe that she has it all wrong.
To be quite candid with you, it sounds like your lady friend is too good for you. You know it, and she knows it. So you've made up a story about irreconciliable political differences. But don't despair - you're not necessarily headed to a lonely old age because of your stubbornness. Go to a Tea Party rally; you'll meet a nice widow there who thinks cutting taxes is just the thing to do.
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Monsoonman | Oct 15, 2010, 09:10 PM EDT
Depends on how good looking she is.
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maloney | Oct 14, 2010, 06:33 PM EDT
Pretend she is Pelosi and run like hell.
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irishfez | Oct 14, 2010, 04:11 PM EDT
No, I don't think this will work out, especially if they are so extreme!
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