Top ten best ways to breakup with an Irishman

Tell him one or two of the following lines and he’ll be glad you kicked him out the door.

Tell him one or two of the following lines and he’ll be glad you kicked him out the door.

1. "Sure your mother never liked me anyway" - Forces him to think of it as a choice between you and the mammy - she wins anyway.

2. "Sure you can get back with the lads now and the craic in the pub" - Watch him light up with the idea of cheering in the local with the lads for the Yankees/ManUtd/Jets whomever without a care in the world.

3.  "I’ll miss going shopping with you" - Guaranteed to have him break out in a cold sweat.

4. "It means we won’t have to go to therapy together to discuss our feelings after all" - He’ll think he’s the luckiest man alive.

5. "My girlfriends will miss you when I tell them" - A gaggle of women discussing him - Ouch!

6. "I’ll miss all the weepie movies we went to" - Great he’ll think, now for some Terminator-type mindless blood and gut.

7. "I thought we’d either get married or break up." - He’ll wipe the sweat off his brow - commitment? What’s that?

8. "At least I can stop planning the honeymoon" - Wow, dodged a bullet there.

9. "You would have made great babies" - Ahh get me out of here.

10. "I had been planning the hen party for months" - Jesus, call it the great escape.

* Originally published in 2011.

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