The Irish are justly famous for their hospitality. But the flip side of this welcoming tradition is that, in every Irish household, there are unwritten -- but ironclad -- rules of conduct. Many of these rules seem so normal to Irish people that to see them written down in black and white seems just as hilarious as the fact that we follow them without thinking.
The following list of ten things you should never do in an Irish household by blogger Robbie Dunne will remind Irish people everywhere of the quirks and oddities of growing up in Ireland.
1. Let the heat get out.
When you walk into a room and don't close the door behind you in the middle of winter, you’re asking for “a mouthful of abuse” or “a slap on the side of the head, depending on how close you are to the offended party.”
2. Let the fire go out.
To let the fire go out on your watch is seen as a sign of pure laziness and selfishness. “This might seem a little dramatic but it is true. You will never be able to own your own house or live alone if you can't simply "throw a few briquettes on the fire"’.
3. Leave the immersion on.
You can go to hell for this one. The ultimate act of laziness and selfish disregard is to leave the immersion on. The usual response from Irish parents are something along the lines of ‘where do you think the money comes from??’ while helpfully informing you that it doesn’t grow on trees.
4. Leave the curtains pulled later than 9 o’clock in the day.
Leaving the curtains closed usually means no one has bothered getting up yet so the usual Irish mammy response to forgetting to open the curtains in a room is ‘"They'll think we're sleeping all day"’.
5. Throw your dinner in the bin.
This is something you simply don’t do. Most farm households will have a scrap bucket for their dogs that everything from a left over potato to the quarter of a dodgy indian curry you brought home on a night out will make its way into.
6. Boil the kettle with no water in it.
Making the mistake of boiling a kettle without water is simply a waste of good tea making time not to mention that it turns the mundane kettle into a lethal explosive device according to many Irish parents. After we’ve been warned about the dangers of exploding kettles and picking bits of metal out of our faces for the next month, we learn to pick up that kettle and give it a good shake before boiling.
7. Make tea for yourself without offering some to the rest of the family.
Irish families have a mental scoreboard in their head, so that although you may think you have gotten away with conveniently forgetting the rest of your family while making a lovely cuppa for yourself, it’s been noted, recorded and shelved on the mental scoreboard and Irish grudges are not known for their brevity. The exception to the rule, Robbie reminds us, is the Irish son, whom the Irish mammy could simply never exclude from the tea round.
8. Eat a sandwich without a bag of crisps (chips).
The Irish sandwich is not something to be messed with but when in another country, one has to settle for adding second rate crisps with our sandwiches in wistful memory of the King or Tayto taste. The most fulfilling sandwich doesn’t quite hit the spot without a packet of cheese and onion to complete it!
9. Change the channel when your mother is watching Coronation Street.
Log in with your social accounts:
Or, log in with your IrishCentral account:
Don't have an account yet? Register now !
Join IrishCentral with your social accounts:
Already have an account ? Log in
Or, sign up for an IrishCentral account below:
Make sure we gathered the correct information from you
You already have an account on IrishCentral! Please confirm you're the owner.
Our new policy requires our users to save a first and last name. Please update your account: