Top ten things to dislike about Irish women

The reasons I’m steering clear of the Celtic colleens

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Irish dating advice - Top ten things to dislike about Irish women

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Last month I was inspired to write to IrishCentral after Colleen’s Harte’s piece on “Ten things I now dislike about Irish men”. While it’s fair to say that for the most part we’re not all George Clooney-esque or anywhere near perfect, I thought it only fair that the Irish-American male’s voice be heard.

Although I’ve dated some great Irish ladies, who are feisty, fiery, smart and great fun this is not always the case. Irish women aren’t so perfect themselves and that’s why I’ll be giving them a wide berth on the dating scene. Frankly, recently, I find Irish women to be more trouble than they’re worth.

Here are my reasons why:

Fake tan

The smell of this stuff alone is enough to put you off any Irish woman for life. Their insistence to cover themselves in false tan in the hopes of turning themselves into a bronzed goddess, there really is no point ladies.

I have had to dump several sets of bed sheets after a strange orange  Shroud of Turin like imprint was left behind. Give me pasty skin any day over an orange umpa lumpa from “Willy Wonka”.

Drinking

When someone told me that any Irish woman could drink me under the table, I brushed it off as an urban myth. Years later drinking beer and shots of whiskey with an Irish lady friend, I learnt the hard way.

Yes, yes it’s honorable you have a good tolerance for alcohol, but that does not give you the right to harass the barman at 3am for more shots. Less is more ladies.

Paranoid

I swear, if I’d heard the phrase “what’s that suppose to mean?” one more time! Irish women seem convinced that all men are speaking in hidden meanings and are in fact always having a go at them. This is not the case.

Irish women need to relax and learn to be less paranoid. There’s no better way to start a fight than digging at innocent comments. Let it go. Even if you’re trying to be nice it can still back fire due to their paranoia.

Cannot walk in their shoes

Too many women move to New York with aspirations of becoming a character from Sex and the City. The Irish especially seem to have an affinity for Carrie Bradshaw and her sky-scraper heels.

It’s a simple rule ladies, if you cannot walk in them, leave them at home. You may not be the tallest breed of women in the world, but I’d much rather see you arrive in sneakers, than have to haul ass home with you strewn over my shoulder.
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