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Top ten Christmas jokes guaranteed to make the cat laugh

Even the biggest Grinches around will be laughing at these pretty silly jokes

By: BERNIE MALONE | Published Friday, December 9, 2011, 7:31 AM | Updated Friday, December 9, 2011, 10:12 AM

Santa Claus

Love them or hate them, cheesy, silly jokes are all part of the good cheer during the festive season. After the success of my first selection I put together another list of ten stupid Christmas jokes. Enjoy!

Q: What do elves learn in school?
A: The Elf-abet!

Q: If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
A: Missile toe!

Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.

Q: Why does Santa have three gardens?
A: So he can ho-ho-ho.

Q: Where do polar bears vote?
A: The North Poll.

Q: What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
A: Crisp Cringle.

Q: What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
A: Claustrophobic.

Q: If Santa rode a motorcycle, what kind would it be?
A: A Holly Davidson.

Q: What did the grape say to the raisin?
A: 'Tis the season to be jelly.

Q: What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
A: Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!

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