Hello New York. Those scorching days of summer are slowly drawing to a close.
The kids of St. Barnabas, PS 19, and Yonkers Montessori Academy are getting ready to go back to school. You moms over there are welcoming the routine no doubt.
Tibbetts Park will be getting quieter, the J-1 students will be bidding adieu to their summer of fun, and the Halloween decorations will soon be on display in Walmart and Target.
It’s the same here. In fact a lot of kids, both in primary and secondary, are back to school this week in Ireland. The roads are already busier at 8:30 a.m.
A new season is approaching and life is taking a turn like it does every September, and that’s okay. It’s supposed to be that way, isn’t it?
We are back in Ireland now a little over three months. By we, I mean my husband John (a Limerick man), our son Colum (21-months) our daughter Sadie (six-months) and I (from Kerry). We moved back to Limerick in May after nine wonderful years in New York.
I think I can safely say we are finally settled, emotionally and physically.
It probably took longer physically than emotionally. What I mean by that is in our hearts we always knew Ireland was the place we want to be, the place we want to raise our kids and the place we want to grow old together, so the emotional transition (aside from the sadness of leaving our great friends behind in New York) has been easier.
Physically it was difficult as one can imagine. Finding a house, furnishing it (with our furniture from the U.S.), purchasing, insuring and taxing cars. Setting up phones, bank accounts, televisions, all that stuff.
There are still unpacked boxes scattered throughout the house, and if I’m being honest, because where we live at the moment is a rental I’m thinking of shutting the door on the boxes and leaving them be until we finally buy a home in a year or two.
I think it’s only in the last week or two that we’ve had a chance to breathe. In between working, creating a normal environment for the kids and getting organized it’s been a little hectic to say the least.
People ask me all the time what are the differences between life in America and life in Ireland. There isn’t any drastic difference, but there are some minor ones.
I suppose the top four are as follows -- the cost of living, our social lives, a family support network, and the kids.
I think I could write a whole article on the cost of living. When we came home three years ago to get married everything was a lot more expensive.
People turned their noses up at discount supermarket chains Aldi and Lidl (German owned supermarkets which are a lot cheaper than Dunnes and Tescos). People went out for expensive meals and drank fine wine that they couldn’t pronounce the name of. They drove brand new cars, outdid each other with birthday parties and vacationed in Europe twice a year.
If we moved home to this Ireland three years ago, living expenses would have been a lot higher and our lives wouldn’t be as comfortable as they are now.
I do 90 percent of my shopping in the Aldi down the road. Several of their products are Irish sourced and packaged too. I only go to Tescos for baby formula simply because Aldi doesn’t carry any.
I even use the German diapers (or nappies as they are called here). They are almost 60 percent cheaper than Pampers and Huggies. Their quality is equal to that of the big brand names we’ve become slaves to over the past few years.
The same size packet of pasta in Dunnes (Dunnes own brand) is €1.59. It is 69 cent in Aldi. My total weekly shop (and remember I’ve two kids) is less than €90 ($70) and that feeds us for the week.
In New York I would easily spend double that in Stop n Shop and I would buy the kids diapers, formula, toilet paper, baby wipes and water in bulk at BJs on a monthly basis. (Our BJ’s bill always hit over the $400 mark).
If we go out for a meal here in Limerick we can enjoy a few glasses of wine, a nice dinner and a taxi home for about €80. If we avail of the early bird (dinner between 5-7 p.m.) we can even do it a little cheaper. And having family around to babysit helps with the cost of a sitter.
In New York (in our single days before the kids) we would easily spent $200 on a night out and a guaranteed $300 if we went all out with a sitter in the past two years.
It’s rare now to see a 2012 car parked in any front yard here. Car sales are down enormously, much to our advantage when we got home.
However, the cost of a car is still a lot cheaper in the U.S. and currently the gas prices in Ireland are about to hit a record high this year, thus making traveling a lot more expensive. People are now foregoing the Sunday afternoon dinners with family a few towns over for a lazy day on the couch because of the rising fuel prices.
I’m on the road a lot with work so I spend about €150 ($110) a week on diesel. John, who works 15 minutes from the house, spends about €100 every two weeks. He also has a diesel car.
Gone are the days of big birthday parties for the kids in expensive outdoor/indoor play areas.
People are reverting back to having a few children over at the house, making rice-crispy buns and playing games.
It makes it a lot more affordable and also a lot more personal. People had lost the run of themselves there for a while, trying to out-do one another.
And people are back vacationing in Ireland. It’s nice. It really is.
We took the kids to Fota Wildlife Park in Co. Cork two weeks ago. We stayed overnight at the amazing Garryvoe Hotel in Ballycotton, right on the water.
We had a fantastic, memorable trip and we weren’t alone. The hotel was booked out with Irish visitors.
I asked the girl at reception and she said nearly all their customers that week were from various parts of Ireland. People can’t afford to take a family to Europe anymore, so they sacrifice a few days in the sun to spend time in rainy Ireland and they make the most of it. It’s fun.
Like New York, there are many activities close to us all. Because the country is so small everything is within driving distance if you want it to be.
Before leaving New York we took the kids to Sesame Place in Pennsylvania. I honestly thought we would never see the likes of this in Ireland and then I arrive home to hear about Tayto Park, a similar themed park full of fun for the kids. Ireland really does have a lot to offer families on holidays.
Our social lives in New York had taken a back seat for the past two years, mainly because we had two kids in that short space of time. And now I feel we have it back.
And no, I don’t mean we’re out rocking the clubs of Limerick every Saturday night. What I mean is I now have a house big enough to have friends over for dinner (we do this at least twice a week) and enough bedrooms to have friends with kids come and stay.
Because we have the space (which we never had in New York) we utilize it as much as possible to socialize with our friends and family and I love every minute of it (well, not so much the washing-up).
And one of the most notable differences between our lives in New York and Ireland is having the family around to support us when needed. John’s sisters and mother have been fantastic in offering to babysit at short notice, and my own mother has been awesome.
We are having Sadie’s christening this coming Saturday and Nana Liz has it all under control from the food to the layout of the house. (We are having family back to the house after the church).
We did have wonderful friends who gave up their time in New York to help us out with the kids and we’ll always be grateful to them for that. And now it’s just nice to have family close by to help out, and more importantly, for them to be part of our kids’ lives.
And lastly, the kids. Seeing Colum run around the back garden kicking his ball, pushing his bike, picking up pegs from the grass or chasing spiders (much to his mommy’s horror) is worth it all. He has the space and freedom to do it here.
When his friends come around (or my friends with their kids who will soon become his friends) they go outside and entertain themselves. And when it’s raining they come inside to the playroom and fight over the toys.
Seeing Colum and Sadie getting to know their aunts, uncles, cousins and nanas is priceless.
There is no doubt Colum and Sadie would have had a great life in New York too, but John and I feel that we’re giving them so much more here in Ireland and that will always outweigh any doubts that may ever arise about our move home.
17 Comments
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Switch to the desktop site to post a comment.NickOHara | Sep 02, 2012, 01:53 AM EDT
I stumble into a Sons of the Hibernians gathering ... lost. They set me on the right path. Blessing on them all. I asked about their organization, and joining ... alas, my only REAL association to the Emerald Jewel is the contribution of red hair brought by my Scandinavian, Viking, fore-bearers .... .... is there no mercy for the misbegotten ?
Hostie88 | Aug 31, 2012, 05:37 PM EDT
Just moved back last September with three older kids after 10 years in NJ. Love both countries however Ireland is so laid back and relaxed in comparison. Love living closet the sea, lots of people out jogging, walking and out town is buzzing. Kids have much more time off school which they love, College is free and sports clubs are so inexpensive compared to NJ. We were paying 2000 a year for our 11 year old to play with NJ Rangers. Our local club here with turf , floodlit pitches and clubhouse is 130 euro a year. Groceries are such good value in comparison to shop rite and acme but eating out very expensive unless you go for an earlybird or use a group on. HS better in NJ and generally the US are much more organized. our son went on a trip to Europe and we got minimal information home. We didn't gave to sign any paperwork or insurance forms , just pay the money and turn up at the airport. So different from the US and takes a bit of getting used to. Kids walk and bus it everywhere, cars at 17 unheard if. Little ones ride their scooters and walk to school in the mornings too. Overall we miss the warm weather in NJ, the reliable communications and great organization with schools, sports clubs and and day trips to NYC. We love Ireland for the scenery, Proximity to European cities, great restaurants that stay open after 10pm, relaxed way of life. We don't like the rain, lack of snow, high of gas and cars and social welfare system. Every place has its pro and cons. We all have US citizenship and ave no doubt our kids will return to the land of opportunity but for the moment we are enjoying the beautiful Emerald Isle.
McNamara31 | Aug 31, 2012, 01:37 PM EDT
Best of luck and good fortune to you and yours.
mamaginnty | Aug 31, 2012, 12:13 PM EDT
esatdigiwank no such thing as blow-ins now, ah the begrudgers April, I wish you well. Even with the cutbacks things get tough but there is no place like Ireland, especially in the rural country areas, which is heaven for children. Enjoy. Like every country you get to find out where the bargains are. When I was in NY, it seemed to be trendy to phone out for meals delivered rather than home cooking, and I am not talking pizza del. I seen so many even going out to breakfast of all things. Give me the simple life, my cottage, orchard and veg garden, which so many of us still have over here. Dublin, Cork etc are just like any other cities, Ireland is still covered with green fields, and as April mentions, generations growing up together. Great.
esatdigiwank | Aug 31, 2012, 06:36 AM EDT
"People can't afford to take a family to Europe anymore.." Maybe some of them ought to cut back on the weekly 'elbow-bending..
esatdigiwank | Aug 31, 2012, 06:33 AM EDT
Think she could do with reading a little of David McWilliams' works; if only to discover how powerless being an 'Outsider is in Ireland. To find that you can only ever get so far in the sphere of lets say decision-making at local level, that biased parochial favouritism will thwart your children's ambitions. Or to be more extreme, she can try Frank McCourt's revelatory depiction of life in Limerick (albeit in the 1950s?), insofar as Ire. is reverting to that execrable time again. He did not stick around very long - hotfooted it back to NY. You have to be resident an inordinate length of time before you are no longer considered a blow-in, in many parts..
angrypaddy | Aug 31, 2012, 12:43 AM EDT
Good luck with buying a house by the time you get one the tax on it will cost you more than the mortgage as for it less expensive there you gota be kidding me.We will see what you have to say after the budget
irishcoffeekid | Aug 30, 2012, 09:26 PM EDT
I live in Washington DC and don't find it to be nearly as costly for dinner/drinks out as she was paying in NY but its a matter of where you go and how upscale or lowscale you go. All depends what you compare with. There is no doubt about it that Aldi and Lidl are a hell of a lot cheaper - i see that everytime I'm home too - I do however see how expensive most things are from cars, to gas, to clothing - you even go to an outlet mall in Ireland (and there arent that many but I was in Kildare the last time i was home - its a far cry from a US outlet - all they've done is recreated Grafton Street in Kildare and called it an outlet - you still pay 5 times for a standard branded top there what you'd pay here in the USA in Filenes of Maxx etc. Clothing in Dunnes and Pennies has come on in quality and is the best value but beyond that hard to find good bargains in ireland (even for kids clothing). Sales are not real sales there either. Having said all that, the more important remark in the article is that its been a happy transition and I totally agree the part about the quality of life for the kids with relations around them. I miss my 4 year old niece and would love to be closer but there is no way id get as good a job or quality of life there as I have in the USA now - for now it will be visits whenever i can get the cheaper flights!
mccrawf | Aug 30, 2012, 08:06 PM EDT
I live in the the NY metro area and dinner out with a few drinks or a bottle of wine usually cost me about $45 to $55 pp. I can't imagine where they were eating that cost $100 pp plus!
mtheresa | Aug 30, 2012, 04:49 PM EDT
Your conversion of euros to dollars is way off. 150euro for diesel equals $187.50. Today's stock market rate is $1.25 per euro. You multiply euros by 1.25 to get your answer. Friends just returned from Ireland paid up to $1.35 per euro when cashing in their american money. Dining out in Ireland, even at the smallest places,is expensive. Wine, etc. 2-1/2times or more, than US. Good luck.
WoundedKnee | Aug 30, 2012, 02:41 PM EDT
Good Luck to Ms Drew, but she certainly is in a minority as regards Irish people who return to live there. I have known quite a few, including one poor guy who had not bothered to take out US citizenship. When he got sick of living back in Ireland, and thought of his much better life over here, he tried to come back. Unfortunately, he had been out of the US too long--US Immigration at Shannon took his Green Card and wouldn't let him enter the US. I hope Ms Drew is a US citizen, at least that gives her a choice. As regards cost of living, i would say to compare Ireland with NY is unrealistic. Much better to compare Ireland with PA, or North Carolina, or Texas. In that case you'll find that Ireland is pretty expensive. The only thing I see Ireland consistently less expensive is fruit. We have really lost the plot in the US with fruit prices, I don't know what's going on in California. In Ireland you buy nice fruit for half what you pay here. Pus, there's a great range and quality, plums, avocados, peaches, kiwi, etc that is much better than where I live. Of course there are questions about Ireland's importing apples from Chile or Brazil, kiwis from Kenya, grapes from South Africa etc. Not good for the environment.
Hostie88 | Aug 30, 2012, 02:23 PM EDT
My comment??
staker42 | Aug 30, 2012, 11:48 AM EDT
I would not want auto rely on on this ladies info I she thinks Ireland is cheaper than the good old USA . I am in Ireland for a month and I don't see things cheaper How about the cost of petrol probably two and one half times more expensive. I think this lady thinks she is buying things in dollars instead of euros. I spoke to a lady in workinG in a Bank who has been here 16 years and can't wait to get back to New York. Ms Drew you should be happy your kids areUS citizens so they will have the opportunity tOgo back to the States legally as. No doubt they will want to.
Searlit | Aug 30, 2012, 11:28 AM EDT
Good update on your return to Ireland and the family. It is very expensive living here, in the NE. Ireland isn't inexpensive, either, though as you say, you never have to travel too far to get where you want to be in Ireland. You lucky woman,you! I had the Fota Island Wildlife park on my list of places to see, alas, you can only see so much on a 2 week vacation. Sláinte!
wjb1tex | Aug 30, 2012, 10:29 AM EDT
Very nice. So many times I see people who moved in one direction or another spend their words bashing the place they left instead of describing the joy of the "new" home. I suspect those people will soon discover they don't like that place so much either. Your article is wondeful.
mcdolan | Aug 30, 2012, 10:17 AM EDT
A transplanted New Yorker myself, I thoroughly enjoyed this article and can relate to much of it. My daughter was 4-going on-5, and the freedom she enjoyed and the friends she made upon relocating to Leitrim were things that made the transition that much easier. I've never regretted a minute of it and it's now 15 years!
jamieLM | Aug 30, 2012, 10:12 AM EDT
@April - Interesting read. Using your life in N.Y as your frame of reference to discuss/compare the differences between life in Ireland to that in the U.S. is completely understandable. I'm sure you know, though, that the cost of living is very much higher in N.Y. than in other parts of the U.S. It certainly doesn't cost my husband and me nearly that much to have a very nice dinner/evening out and to pay a babysitter. I've traveled to the NE and I'm always shocked at the prices of everything there in comparison to what I pay in the Midwest. EVERYTHING is higher there. Anyway, it's nice to know you've settled in and are enjoying being home.