Irish versus Irish American – which man is the ideal companion?

Irish men are the archetypal “man’s man” - Irish American men are usually pretty sensitive

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Which do you prefer -- Irish or Irish American men?

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From 3,000 miles away and a decade of relative peace, I imagine it’s pretty easy to talk about the joys of an unending cycle of violence that tore up families, land, and the hearts of the young, who saw their innocence destroyed by it.

If he’s been to Ireland, ask him what he did during his last trip to Ireland, and he’ll only give one response: boasting about how he drank so much and so often, and about how he can’t remember what happened. (Again, highly impressive...NOT!)

Ask him about what his culture means to him, or about the complex history of the people he claims to be so close to, or the artistry produced by this nation, and he draws a blank. If it doesn’t relate to drinking, partying and all things that make him seem even more “cool” than he thinks he is (and he thinks he is very cool), the Irish American man doesn’t exhibit much interest in truly exploring Irish culture.

Finally, if he is in the company of only Irish Americans...the ethnic slurs start to surface. This, in spite of the fact that often, his parents and/or grandparents are Irish immigrants...

As for the Irish male, his Irish culture is seemingly a source of embarrassment.

Sure, he has heard of the Irish literary masterpieces (some), and Irish history (a bit), and he has heard his parents and grandparents singing and playing traditional Irish music (often enough) — but he eschews symbols of his Irishness like they’re the plague — or worse, a female who wants him to commit to an exclusive relationship.

He mocks the heartbreaking stories his ancestors told through song as “outdated” material his grandparents are entertained by — but by thinking of it as a form of entertainment in the first place, he is already missing the value of his people’s music. He turns away from it for the meaningless Euro-dance music full of funky house beats. Perhaps he is trying so hard to fit into the “European” mold that he is carelessly losing his “Irish” along the way.

I don’t know how often I’ve been disappointed to meet young Irish men who have flagrantly shed their ties to Irish culture. How many Limerick men I have met who have never heard “Shanagolden!” I can count on one hand the Irish men I’ve met who play traditional Irish instruments, watch performances of Irish plays, attend the local county dinner dances or even watch Gaelic Football games.

We often talk about how the number of Irish in Woodlawn is dwindling, but sometimes it seems like the ones who are here are deliberately but avoiding the opportunity to preserve their heritage here.

And finally, the Irish male makes no secret about referring to American-born people as “narrowbacks” and “yanks.” A favorite conversation topic for the Irish male is deriding Irish Americans for what they perceive as their weakness, stupidity and foolish behaviors. All this, in spite of the fact that he says he’d like to live in America (and then raise his children as Irish Americans!).

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