The ‘Dead Funny’ traces the funniest gravestone epitaphs in Ireland. The Irish have long been known for their love of the macabre and humor, even in death.
Here are my top ten entries. The book written by Allen Foster, a freelance writer, can be purchased at www.gillmacmillan.ie.
1. From Northern Ireland:
“Erected to the memory of JOHN PHILLIPS, accidentally shot as a mark of affection by his brother.
2. Belturbet County Cavan:
Here lies John Highey, whose mother and father were drowned in their passage from America. Had they both lived they would be buried here.”
3. Belfast City Cemetery:
DUFFY: In loving memory of beloved Gerald, husband father, Died 30th November 1989 aged 65 years: I told you’s I was sick.
4. Larne County Antrim:
At the grave of a man hanged for sheep stealing:
Here lies the body of Thomas Kemp, lived by wool died by hemp
5. Belfast:
Beneath this stone lies Katherine my wife
In death my comfort, and my plague through life
Oh liberty! but soft I must not boast
She’s haunt me else , by jingo ,with her ghost
6. Dublin:
Here lies the remains of John Hall, grocer. The world is not worth a fig. I have good raisins for saying so.
7. Youghal, County Cork:
Here lies poor but honest Cecil Pratt. He was a most expert angler until death, envious of his merit threw out his line and hooked him.
8. Waterford:
Here lies the body of Anthony Reynolds, who although a miller was an honest man.”
9. County Clare:
This stone was raised to Sarah Ford, not Sarah’s virtues to record - for they’re well known to all the town. No Lord; it was raised to keep her down.”
10. Mallow, County Cork:
Here lies the body of Edmund Spenser, great great grandson of the poet Spenser, unfortunate from his cradle to his grave.”
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Switch to the desktop site to post a comment.Seanmor | Jun 12, 2013, 10:57 AM EDT
I once read that in a cemetery in the U.S. in the 1800s, there was a grave stone ewh this inscription: "Here lie the remains of poor Miss Lorms. What she wouldn't give to men, she now gives to the worms". But I doubt if such an inscription ever existed.
Seanmor | Jun 11, 2013, 07:42 PM EDT
In a cemetery a few miles from Newmarket (northwest Cork) is a head stone with an inscription i nGaeilge to D.D. Mac Curtáin (a founding member of the Newmarket branch of Conradh na Gaeilge). In the Church of Ireland cemetery in Newmarket is a head stone on the grave of Sarah Curran who was betrothed to Robert Emmet and on this stone is written the last paragraph of Emmet's speech from the dock.
Seanmor | Jun 11, 2013, 01:36 PM EDT
Number One: The article does NOT show the date of John Philips' death or the denomination of the cemetery in which he is buried. But if he died before the fall of 1920, the was no such entity as "Northern Ireland", and all christian denominations still still consider Ireland a single single ecclesiasical entity.
themurphia | Jul 29, 2011, 01:51 PM EDT
Billyp79:The one you quote continues..*To follow you I'm not content...How do I know which way you went* I suppose the French would call it 'Le Dernier cri'...OK *the Defense rests*...I'll get my coat..!
themurphia | Jul 29, 2011, 01:26 PM EDT
There's a rude one which my Fa may have made up..it goes something like this...'Beneath these stones lies Mary Jones'..something something something...and goes on...'But these are not the only stones that Mary Jones lay under'...sorry he was a bit of a lad my dad...!
eiriamach | Jul 28, 2011, 06:33 PM EDT
Wit, wisdom, and sometimes folly: An old tombstone still stands beside a ruined church in Ireland, with two of my ancestors interred beneath it. The stone carver might have been rushed, or maybe he just had poor math skills. The epitaph reads, "Sacred to the memory of Hugh _____ late of Newtown, who departed this life 12 Feb. 1782, aged 66 years. Also Patrick, his son, who departed this life 7 Nov., 1817, aged 33 years." Actually, church records show that the son was 53, not 33, at the time of his death, so he was not born two years after his father died! My immigrant ancestors did pass down the information to my father's generation that there was a mistake on the gravestone, but I wonder why they never had it corrected!
EdShevlin | Jul 28, 2011, 12:40 PM EDT
How about, "Here lies an athiest, all dressed up and no place to go."
JohnJoe4444 | Jul 27, 2011, 06:16 PM EDT
In Wexford I have heard of one which roughly goes "Gentle reader, approach with gravity, here Dentist $**%6 has filled his last cavity"
Ms.Gail | Jul 27, 2011, 04:43 PM EDT
Oh my yes. Thanks.
jjkleprechaun | Jul 27, 2011, 01:30 PM EDT
I think they are wonderful including the 2 from readers! I only wish I had written down the ones my parents and family knew about in the family cemetery! We are creative in our final parting comments, aren't we!!!
JohnnyMac | Jul 27, 2011, 12:45 PM EDT
Then there was another favorite of mine: Here lies our beloved Anna Done to death by a banana. T'wasn't the fruit that made her go, but the skin of the thing that layed her low.
Billyp79 | Jul 27, 2011, 09:31 AM EDT
My favorite: Remember me as you pass by As you are now so once was I As I am now soon you will be Remember death, come follow me.