St. Patrick’s Day is over, the world has packed up its shiny green hats, suspenders and wigs for the year, the face paint have been put away until next year.
We know everyone’s Irish on St. Patrick’s Day, but what does it really take to be Irish?
Here’s a funny list compiled from writer Joe Keefe’s book.
How many do you agree with? Let us know below.
1.You will never play professional basketball.
2.You have no idea how to make a long story short.
3.You are very good at playing a lot of very bad golf.
4.You have never hit your head on the ceiling.
5.You're strangely poetic after a few beers.
6.Someone in your family is incredibly cheap. It is more than likely you.
7.You don't know the words, but that doesn't stop you from singing.
8.You can't wait for the other guy to stop talking so you can start talking.
9.You're not nearly as funny as you think you are, but what you lack in talent, you make up for in frequency.
10.You are, or know someone, named "Murph." If you don't know Murph, then you know Mac, if you don't know Murph or Mac, then you know Sully, and you'll probably also know Sully McMurphy.
and because it’s simply so true:
11.You are genetically incapable of keeping a secret.
Source: Being Irish, Contemplations On Nature And Meaning
16 Comments
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Switch to the desktop site to post a comment.IrelandNorth | Mar 30, 2012, 08:50 AM EDT
ciaramurphy! Not caring less about a part of one's country is not a virtue. But then, why am I surprised given the generally disrespectful and condescending nature of your virulent posts. One thing's for sure. You certainy would not qualify as Irish. More likely you would fall under the post-colonial west-Brit Free-Stater. Do IC a favour. Take early retirement.
PatriciaMarya | Mar 22, 2012, 08:26 PM EDT
First of all, who checks your headlines? Know has a "k" in front of the "now" and Irish should start with a capital "I" - please, please check before you submit.
citizen69 | Mar 22, 2012, 04:30 PM EDT
You know you're Irish if...... You were born in Ireland!
Mary Westphal | Mar 22, 2012, 10:51 AM EDT
Pretty Irish website!! Looks fun and interesting.
RichardP | Mar 22, 2012, 09:39 AM EDT
No.11 would be the greatest American trait surely..that's why all the 9/11 conspiracy theorists are full of shite
marsman | Mar 22, 2012, 06:54 AM EDT
Alternative suggestion, because it would have more relevance: Irish Central some time ago published a great article about the Irish media who are full in crisis modus, after hyping up all and everything that crashed. It's an article that would deserve repeated posting. Search words: A crisis everywhere except in the Irish media.
seansarto | Mar 21, 2012, 11:22 PM EDT
It is that Irish vein in me that I give - and owe - credit to for finding the fiercest joys of life and living in even the most bitter of lost and lonesome battles....
tombegs | Mar 21, 2012, 08:54 PM EDT
The jury found me guilty on all 11 counts. Sentencing to follow
ciaradexy | Mar 21, 2012, 07:40 PM EDT
Hughaed, well said. Americans with Irish links tend to be the most horrid of Oirish stereotypes and have nothing in common with the average Paddy! SeamusMartin, there are plenty of people who couldnt care less about the North of Ireland and your first sentence doesnt make sense.
SeamusMartin | Mar 21, 2012, 05:22 PM EDT
We are easy to laugh, to cry and will fight to the death for a righteous cause. We want a United Ireland. Orange, White and Greeen; no longer a dream! Erin Go Bragh!
DrSheilahere | Mar 21, 2012, 05:19 PM EDT
Sorry, Obama, you will never pass for Irish. You failed this test.
hughaed | Mar 21, 2012, 04:57 PM EDT
Well, I'm from Ireland but don't find any of the lists very humorous. It's like corned beef & cabbage which is NOT part of Irish culinary heritage but it is part of Irish-American heritage. The so-called "Irishness", referred to in this article, has little to do with the Irish who were born & raised in Ireland & appears to refer to those who were born in Boston, NY, Philadelphia, etc who seem to assume an Irishness when it suits them, especially on St. Patrick's Day or when drinking. As my aunt used to say: when Irish men talk & drink it's pub-talk. This is more true of articles like the unfunny one here.
khayes8684 | Mar 21, 2012, 04:52 PM EDT
Oh, how true! Also, knowing where the pubs are and their opening hours.
Ballyphehane1 | Mar 21, 2012, 03:55 PM EDT
I got another list from my brother recently (it's currently doing the rounds on facebook) - I particularly like the last one. Here you go: Irishness is... 1. Describing someone with longstanding, persistent and untreated psychosis as "a character". 2. Saying "There's definitely no recession here!" every time you see more than 5 people in a pub 3. Saying "Ah but he's very good to his mother" about some utter langer 4. TK Red lemonade and white pudding. Not together of course 5. That mini heart attack you get if you go out and forget to turn off the immersion 6. You're not drinking??? Are you on antibiotics? 7. Wallpaper on your school books 8. Being Grand!! 9. Boiling everything in a huge pot for 3 hours 10. Paschal Sheehey RTE news (AKA Plastic Sheeting) 11. Being absolutely terrified of a wooden spoon! 12. Learning a language for 12 years and not being fluent 13. Going absolutely mental at concerts because famous people rarely come over 14. Knowing that flat 7UP heals all illnesses 15. Calling Joe Duffy instead of the Guards
haney57 | Mar 21, 2012, 01:57 PM EDT
cool i like reading about any thing about my irish roots.
SeamusMor | Mar 21, 2012, 10:07 AM EDT
If you want everyone to know something, tell an Irishman that it's a secret!