|The Olsen twins - dating a twin means double trouble for our "Joe"|
I bet you never heard a problem like mine before. I read your column every week and I think it's great. I have never seen a problem like what I'm going through, so I thought I would give you a try to see if you can help. I'll call myself Joe...
I met this beautiful girl over a month ago. She is very pretty and the sex is great. No one is perfect, but there are some things that I wish I could change about her, but nothing major. In fact, I think I might just be acting too picky.
She told me she is a twin. Since we met I kept saying that I really wanted to meet her sister. I've never dated a twin before. I sensed that she was avoiding it until last weekend when it was their birthdays, so since I was invited to the party, I got to meet her.
Her twin looks exactly like her. I know there are identical twins and I've met many of them, but usually they aren't exact. Her and her sister are exactly like each other. I think it's really cool.
Well the problem is this: since the party was at my girlfriend's apartment, she was busy doing most of the work, which left me to be alone a lot. I approached the twin and we ended up talking the entire night together.
The twin is not only more outgoing than her sister, but made my laugh, has a great job, owns her own house and has something special that I can't even explain. I hate to say this, but If I would have met them both, I would have chosen the twin.
What the fxxx do I do now? I can't stop thinking of the twin and how much more compatible we are than my girlfriend.
Although I didn't hit on her, I did pick up on some flirting on her part, and I feel like I want to take the chance of seeing how she feels about us dating. I told you, this is crazy, but I can't help myself. Let me know what you think. Thanks, - Joe
Wow, you got yourself a big dilemma on your hands. If you tell the twin how you feel you run a very high risk that she will pick the loyalty of her sister over you, and then you'll lose both of them. If you tell your girlfriend you prefer her sister, she will hate you and that will ruin all future family gatherings.
I suggest you wait a week. Go out with your girlfriend as much as possible and give it a real chance. Remember no one is perfect as you know and the twin might have been just being polite or putting on her best "face" and not really as good as she presented herself to be. You don't want to risk losing your girlfriend for a dream that will never come true.
After a week if you do not think you can be truly happy with your girlfriend, then I suggest you break up with her and just tell her the truth that you do not think you both are compatible enough for each other. Tell her all the reasons why you are not compatible. She might, unlikely, but might say that her sister has all those traits that you are looking for and that she is more compatible to you...Then you also took the high road and broke up with her first before doing anything stupid like cheating or hitting on the sister.
Hopefully if she brings up her sister, you have it made! If she doesn't, do not bring up how compatible you are to her twin that day. You will ruin everything.
After some time, maybe a month, try to meet up with the twin somewhere where you think she might be (without stalking her obviously) and if fate is on your side, ask her out. If it is meant to be, it will be.
As long as you handle this the right way and take the high road, I hope it works out for you. Please keep me posted. - MTN
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