|I said my ex girlfriend's name in my sleep! Help!
I really need help from you and I need it fast. Last night I was making it with my girl and we both fell asleep after. She woke me up screaming at me that I'm a cheating loser since apparently in my sleep I said the name of my ex girlfriend. I swear to you Maureen, I did not cheat with my ex. It was just a dream, and I don't even remember having the dream.
I talk in my sleep all the time and every girlfriend I've had has brought it up to me. It has never caused a problem like it did tonight. My ex girlfriends always thought it was funny and would laugh at me about it. Never did they react or accuse me of something like this.
I think she is totally over reacting since she kicked me out of her apartment and it was 2am. There was no reason for that. I told her I didn't remember having any dream of my ex, but that wasn't good enough for her. I asked her if I could sleep downstairs on the couch and we could discuss this in the morning, but she would not have it. She kicked me to the curb.
If I didn't like her so much I'd be done with her for that behavior. My friends all like her and think she's hot. I'm 29 and this is the first girl that I've dated for over a year. Usually after a few months something happens and it just ends. This one I thought was a keeper until last night.
What do you suggest I do. Believe it or not, my friends are the ones that told me to write to you, since they know she reads and likes your column. So use my name. It's Tim.
Wow this is a first for me. After helping singles for over 13 years I thought I heard it all, but this is the first. She kicks you out because in your sleep you mention the name of your ex, and you don't even recall saying her name or having a dream about her. Wow...
I have to admit, I talk in my sleep as well. Now you have me paranoid. Seriously, I think she is definitely over reacting. Think about it; you don't even have any proof that you did anything wrong.
You also handled the situation very well by suggesting that you sleep on the couch and talk about it in the morning. That should have been acceptable. To kick you out in the middle of the night for something that you did not do on purpose is really unfair to you.
The only thing I would like to ask is if there is any reason why she might be jealous of your ex girlfriend. For example, do you talk about her? Is she still in your life? Do you still have feelings for her? If all of those questions have yes responses, then perhaps she has a reason for her over reacting. However, If the answers are no, then you need to be honest with her that you feel she is being unfair to you since you didn't do anything wrong!
I always say, what is meant to be will be. So if she breaks up with you over this little thing, then she wasn't the right one for you in the first place. If this is how she reacts to someone small, can you imagine if you do actually make a mistake? Instead of it being a fight, a discussion and then making up, you my friend will be kicked out to the curb again, for good.
Good luck with her reaction. Thanks to your friends for having you write in. - MTN
PLEASE CONTINUE TO EMAIL IN YOUR QUESTIONS TO MTN AT firstname.lastname@example.org.
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