Hey, did ya hear the one about the drunk Brit who...

Posted by wolfhound at 8/9/2009 6:56 PM EDT

It always brings a smile to Wolfie's fangs when what goes around, comes around.

No nation on earth has done more to paint the Irish as a land of drunks and losers than Britain. For a Brit, an Irish joke comes as easily and a lot more often as a fart after a meal, and that's why this news item FROM A REAL AND PROPER BRITISH NEWS WEBSITE (Oops, the "caps" key must have gotten stuck! Damn these furry paws...) is such a wonderful treat.

I could rewrite the item from the site (inthenews.co.uk), but that's a hell of a lot of work. So, having given them the credit, here it is:

The current crash in the price of airline tickets and the propensity for stag and hen nights abroad are tarnishing Britain’s reputation in foreign countries.

With cheap flights becoming more and more available as the airline industry reaches an unprecedented peak of competition, more Britons are opting to turn the traditional hen or stag night into a weekend of hedonism in other countries. After all it’s now possible to get flights to cities like Prague for less than the cost of a night out in your local town.

With countries such as Greece and the Czech Republic offering very relaxed attitudes towards alcohol, these destinations are being seen as perfect party locations.

According to Foreign Office statistics, in the period from April 2005 - March 2006, 376 Britons died whilst in France, 6,078 lost their passports whilst in Spain, 955 were admitted to hospital whilst in Greece and 1,368 were arrested whilst in America.

The figures also revealed that with plane tickets being so cheap to the Czech Republic, there were an unusual amount of events requiring assistance from the British Consulate, including lost passports, arrests and admittance to hospital. Research suggests that this is a result of a large amount of hen and stag weekends taking place in Prague.

Another report highlights the behaviour of tourists aged between 16-30 whose primary interest is not the local culture but cheap alcohol and casual sex. 1,000 tourists within this age bracket were interviewed. Of these, 75% cited drinking to excess as their primary reason to travel, 28% cited casual sex, while 5% admitted they were going to involve themselves in violence.

Statistically, Britons also lead the way in staying out in the sun too long and requiring hospital assistance as a result. Over-indulgence in alcohol has been highlighted as a major contributing factor for these figures.


OKAY, WOLFIE'S BACK FOR A SECOND, DAMN THESE KEYBOARDS! HERE'S THE EVEN-BETTER PART:

Ireland has set a precedent that other countries are considering. Once a highly sought after party destination, Dublin has placed a ban on hen and stag parties in the Temple Bar area of the city. While there has been a drop in the trade for alcohol, the amount of arrests and hospitalisations in that area has dropped considerably since the ban was introduced in 1998.

Sooooooooo!!!!! Looks like Mister Pot looks a lot like Mister Kettle! (That means that all these Brits are drunks, for those who are not as schooled as I am in "the classics.")

And so, "whilst" these vacationing British stags and hens get "whilsted" at every pub in Prague, let the few sober ones back sipping from their teacups take a serious look at the world's official new boozehounds.

They won't have to look far.

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