On Sunday afternoon I took a stroll to the Upper West Side to depart from my normal life into a fantasy world where I was a student at Columbia University. This, of course, would mean that I would have to win the genius brain lottery, as well as the actual lottery to attend, which, in my fantasy I had.
Let me tell you, Trinity College doesn’t have a patch on this place. As one of the eight Ivy League colleges and the fifth oldest in America, it has a somewhat White House feel to it, with perfectly trimmed green hedges, immaculately keep facades and the names of great intellectuals, such as Plato, carved into the great concrete buildings. I felt distinctly average, even with the fantasy.
It became apparent that the most recent series of Gossip Girl had been lying to me. There were no Blake Lively look-a-likes sauntering around in their Christian Louboutins, hooking up with their hot professors and having their Daddy’s car pick them up outside.
It seemed that one would be more comfortable hurrying around the impressive Columbia campus with a pile of books covering their face, to hide the stress of the next big assignment and the shame of being seen outside the library in broad daylight.
There was no Chanel or Burberry in sight. You would think students would at least make an effort so they wouldn’t put the beautiful campus to shame. It then occurred to me that Serena van der Woodsen did actually get expelled for being late and secretly dating her professor, despite her impressive grooming.
When I was on my way out I saw a father walking his three-year-old son in through the main gates on the campus and finishing a story with the line “….and that’s how we got democracy.” Talk about starting them early! Hmm, time to look into those lotteries again so!