Donald Trump has finally made it in America. His beefy visage and fake tan skin has finally made it onto an Amazon t-shirt drinking a pint of beer with the message “Make St. Pattie’s Day” great again.
Amazon owner Jeff Bezos may be one of the richest men in the world according to the latest Forbes list with a net value of $50.8 billion, but in this Trump collection he makes or sells some lousy Irish t-shirts. This is the Trump University of t-shirts, actually.
First off, I’m really one not to take offense at much, but the St. Pattie’s usage for St. Patrick annoys me intensely.
Patties are hamburgers. In every thesaurus, no one names patties as diminutive versions of Patrick,
so the Amazon shirt is actually saying Happy St. Hamburger Day which is nonsense.
I also think depicting Trump bedecked as Irish is close to a mortal sin. The racist leaning, emigrant bashing, Muslim banning, big swinging dick of the Republican race has no truck with the Irish.
We should see him for what he is, a throwback to the Know Nothings who hated Irish and Catholics. It is no coincidence that Trump’s old man was in the KKK in 1927 when, as The New York Times reported, he took part in a Queens demonstration against Catholic (i.e., Irish) police officers.
Also, Amazon needs to get the name right. Of course Fred and Donald’s name has been mis-spelt everywhere to date. His real last name is Drumpf, and there’s even a Twitter campaign #MakeDonaldDrumpfAgain, well worth following.
When it comes to changing names Trump, sorry Drumpf, is a skilled student. He made clear he barely believed Barack Obama was who he said he was four years ago when he resurrected the discredited fake birth certificate story.
Drumpf even had the temerity to scold The Daily Show former host Jon Stewart for changing his last name--how’s that for chutzpah?
Back then after a nasty exchange Drumpf tweeted, "I promise you that I'm much smarter than Jonathan Leibowitz -- I mean Jon Stewart @TheDailyShow," adding, "Who, by the way, is totally overrated."
Anyway, big mistake.
On the following Wednesday's The Daily Show, Stewart responded to Trump's slimy discharge with a throwaway joke about Donald Trump's birth name being F---kface Von Clownstick.
So Drumpf Von Clownstick should really be the name on Bezos’s t-shirts for complete accuracy.
But wait, Bezos’s real name is, you guessed it, not Jeff Bezos. It's actually Jeffrey Preston Jorgensen, the name of his father before he divorced his mother.
So Drumpf Von F--face Clownstick meets Jon Leibowitz meets Jeffrey Jorgensen and they decide to make silly St. Hamburger Day t-shirts.
It used to be just anonymous Irish drunks on the t-shirts, but thanks to the AOH and a man called Kevin Westley that has mostly stopped, at least at Walmart.
Instead we have a character called Drumpf dressed as an Irishman, clearly inebriated sipping a beer.
Sounds like a bad idea.