What makes Irish men such a hot commodity in the U.S.? MOLLY MULDOON talks to men, women and some experts, including the Millionaire Matchmaker, Patti Stanger, about the everlasting appeal of the rogue Irish man.
When Patti Stanger was 19 she fell in love with an Irish bartender.
“The accent totally got me, he looked like Gabriel Byrne and I remember he was the best kisser,” the U.S. dating expert told the Irish Voice during an interview on Tuesday.
Stanger, a third generation match maker, CEO and star of the hit Bravo TV show Millionaire Matchmaker, says she can easily see why Irish men prove so popular in a U.S. context.
“They are rugged, tall, sexy and they take charge. You feel like a woman next to them,” she says.
“I would rather have an Irishman than a pretty Wall Street feminine man who makes a lot of money,” she revealed.
The former director of marketing for Great Expectations, the oldest dating service in the U.S., Stanger recalls even in high school in New Jersey that she liked the Irish guys the most. She describes the Kennedy brothers as the “epitome of an Irish American who we all drooled over.”
In one of the world’s largest melting pots such as New York, an Irishman’s brogue will provide endless opportunities with the ladies.
Stanger, who has made her fortune through matchmaking for the wealthy, says her advice for an Irish man wooing that special woman is to “put the whiskey down and don’t drink the whole bottle.”
Stanger also said she wouldn’t mind checking out what’s on offer at Ireland’s famous matchmaking festival at Lisdoonvarna.
“I always wanted to attend and see that,” she said.
“A drinking, fighting, poetic tongued man,” is how David Power, a former New York bartender describes your average Irish man in the New York.
The Dubliner, who met his American girlfriend while working as bartender, says Irish heritage is a big windfall on the dating scene.
“We are new, unknown territory with a good reputation for boozing and banter,” he summed up.
“We are also polar opposites of American men, so in a way we are a niche market.”
Since trading his life behind the taps for a career in finance, Power reflects that most Irish men are equally in awe of American women.
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“You'll also find few Irish bartenders that have Irish girlfriends,” he said.
Monaghan man, Brian O’Reilly works as a bartender in Eamonn Doran's bar in Brooklyn and admits he has been known to use his Irish charisma to win over the ladies.
“It helps quite a bit to be honest. They ask, ‘Where are you from,’ and when I say ‘Ireland’ it’s an ice breaker right away,” he told the Irish Voice.
“Basically the big difference is the same type of woman at home wouldn't look at you. Being Irish you have an advantage.” O’Reilly, who grew up with five sisters, says from an early age he was taught how to treat his female companions.
“You learn to be polite to women and how to treat them they way you want your sisters to be treated,” he said before admitting that “Mammy is number one!”
As he prepared for a date that night with his latest U.S. love interest, O’Reilly reflected that the dating scene in New York is completely different to back home.
“At the beginning it would be hard to get used to the fact that dating was not ‘going out’ with anybody, but I adjusted really fast,” he laughs.
After living in New York for over five years the Monaghan man says he approaches dates with American women in a different way.
“American women don’t drink as much as Irish women so I would take them to the park or a movie or to see sites,” he says.
After spending a semester studying in Ireland, Megan Lynch from Geneva in upstate New York has come to some conclusions concerning Irish men.
A junior in St. Mary’s College Notre Dame, Lynch says Irish guys are very good in social situations.
“Irish guys are much more forward, they are confident in a less arrogant way,” she told the Irish Voice.
“When they approach you it’s in a fun, friendly way and you feel comfortable right away, but here in the U.S. guys can be more arrogant about it,” she added.
Aesthetically she says American men win over, but it’s the Irish charm that really catches the attention.
“Good looking American men are easy to come by, but once you find a good looking Irish man their personality makes them even more attractive, once you are around them and see their true potential,” she maintains.
With leading Irish actors such as Gabriel Byrne, Liam Neeson and Colin Farrell now household names in the U.S., dating coach David Wygant, says that Hollywood has done a lot to enhance the appeal of modern Irish men.
Wygant says Gerard Butler’s portrayal of an Irish man in the film PS I Love You is just one depiction of a romantic Irish man which would make most American women swoon.
“Hollywood is making the Irish man the new flavor of the month,” Wygant, who is based in Los Angeles, told the Irish Voice.
“Irish guys are more charming because of their voice.
“You can take the same sentence spoken by an Irish man and an American man, but women will swoon over the accent,” he said.
Describing Dublin as “one of the most beautiful cities in the world,” the dating expert said he was pleasantly surprised by how Irish men reacted to women in bars.
“The men weren’t staring at women like they hadn’t seen meat in 14 years,’ he recalls. “American guys can be very lecherous.”
Dating an Irishman for the past year, Steph King from Virginia says in her experience the drinking stereotype concerning the Irish is accurate.
“Yes, the cliché is actually true. They also drink during the day, more than any American men I’ve dated or known,” says the digital marketer, who is not turned off by her boyfriend’s drinking habits.
“I’ve noticed that sure Irish men drink often, but they aren’t half as loud as a group of American men can be,” she added.
One drawback she says is their obsession with the American brand Abercrombie and Fitch, something the Virginian adds most U.S. guys grow out of in their teenage years.
“Unfortunately Irishmen wear a lot of Abercrombie. American teenage boys wear Abercrombie, but men do not, so that was something I noticed was very popular with an older age set of Irish guys.
“It would be odd to see an American guy over the age of 20 wearing Abercrombie,” she added.
Despite the occasional drunken slur and odd fashion faux pas, it seems the appeal of the rogue Irish man in the U.S. is popular as ever.
Seasoned Irish American matchmaker Maureen Tara Nelson says in recent years she has seen a surge in American women seeking Irish men.
“I would say over the past couple of years we have seen more of a demand for Irish men,” she told the Irish Voice.
Winner of Best of Long Island Matchmaker and Dating Service for the third year running and with over 1,000 clients on her books, Nelson admits she can see why her female clients are so attracted to Irishmen and suggests a good upbringing has a lot to do with it.
“One of the great advantages and why they make such great husbands is that they are brought up to be great sons,” she says, adding the accent is “the icing on the cake”.
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Switch to the desktop site to post a comment.heather112001 | Mar 28, 2013, 01:03 PM EDT
I have to be honest. I am an American woman of Irish and German descent and I definitely find Irish men to be extremely sexy. I have to agree with the article that the accent plays a big part and would draw a woman in, but the confidence and playfulness is what would probably keep the woman interested.
merefalow | Jan 06, 2012, 11:27 AM EST
lucky guys,but there are a lot of awesome american ladies to, especially deep south,plus a lot of us males are gay..i think its the water,and most paddies are weaned on booze and wouldn't touch water.
cillowen | Jan 05, 2012, 01:42 PM EST
women always want a soft lad.
CitizenWhy | Jan 05, 2012, 10:11 AM EST
Most accurate quote (after you get rid of the Irish bar-fly mama's boys): “Irish guys are much more forward, they are confident in a less arrogant way. When they approach you it’s in a fun, friendly way and you feel comfortable right away, but here in the U.S. guys can be more arrogant about it.” Irish men, simply, can be fun, and fun makes sexual and non-sexual relations better. One thing to add: Irish men make great fathers (putting aside the mean ones). My parents were Irish and when I'm out walking I can get crying babies to laugh and dogs go into the playing stance and want to play with me. I really am always cheerful inside, and even when hurt or worried, that cheerfulness stays active.
Murph46 | Jan 05, 2012, 09:57 AM EST
Now I understand how "Grab a Granny" works!
alicat68 | Sep 02, 2011, 04:04 PM EDT
I so love reading the comments below, had a great chuckle :) Could be why I am divorced and not so good relationships, because none of them are Irish(and or decendents). That sure is something to really think about. However, there is an Ireland trip planned for the next year. And who knows, I may get lucky.
BARNEYKX | Sep 01, 2011, 03:43 PM EDT
Now yer talkin
S.Connolly | Aug 30, 2011, 01:59 AM EDT
Irish men are comfortable being a male. US women don't want to "tame" them at all. When your in bed with an Irishman and he talks to you in Gaelic, oh my God it's like angels singing!! They are polite, funny as hell, and excellent lovers! Confident in their own skin which most US males are not. The wildness in them is so damm exciting and totally wonderful! When you neet and get to converse with a Irishman you get sooo horny you want to jump his bones right then and there!! They are the BEST!!
phearne | Aug 27, 2011, 09:00 AM EDT
Irish men or at least their persona intrigues and captivate women.Too many American men have been pushed and cajoled into becoming what some women thought they wanted,A caring,emotional,understanding,giving man.In becoming more effeminate, the wild lustiness of a man has been lost for the most part.Irish men are perceived as wild,untamed,lusty, and embody all the things many women want deep down in their souls.A wild Heathcliff. A strong take charge man who is not intimidated by a strong woman and is comfortable in his maleness.Sigh! A bit of the wild Irishman can be very appealing.American men ,take back your maleness and add a bit of the Wild Irish maleness into your personality.Please?
johnymac60 | Aug 27, 2011, 07:15 AM EDT
I live in America these days and I have to tell ya, my French-Canadian wife is the greatest thing to happen to me. I consider this Irishman lucky to have found - and married - the love-o'me-loife.
Pittsburghkid | Aug 27, 2011, 12:07 AM EDT
American Men have a saying that all woman are beautiful at 2:00Am (closing time). Actually American Men are feed up with American Woman. So drunken Irishmen are very appealing to them.
TiocfaidhArmani | Aug 26, 2011, 12:09 PM EDT
I think it's because we're a nation of mammy's boys, I'm one and proud. It makes you respect women more when you respect your mother etc. I love American women, they're a lot sweeter than Irish women and more chatty and jaysus the accent gets me every time!
Searlit | Aug 25, 2011, 10:55 PM EDT
We're being facetious jamieLM, don't even try to correct antoman, as you can see, he only gets worse. Sometimes things get so bad, you just have to laugh. You must feel like that doing the kind of work you do. Sometimes, it's laugh, cry or go crazy. Have a good night, I have to go batten down the hatches before the hurricane hits.
Springfield9 | Aug 25, 2011, 08:31 PM EDT
I have just returned from West Cork. I assure you that any Irish man (Barman notwithstanding) might be taken in by an American woman. However, once he really got to know her he'd be on the next plane to the most remote spot in Donegal.
jamieLM | Aug 25, 2011, 04:47 PM EDT
Sorry antoman & Searlit, but as an RN who has worked in the ER, I can assure you that medical personnel aren't concerned (just our mothers are) about the cleanliness of underpants. I've seen underpants of every kind in every condition, including no underpants. Btw: that Irish accent is charming.
antoman | Aug 25, 2011, 03:25 PM EDT
Irishman's foreplay is taking your auld doll by her ponytails, leaning forward, and whispering her sister's name in her ear. Then hold on as she bucks and kicks.
muirisobric | Aug 25, 2011, 02:41 PM EDT
Irishman's foreplay: "Brace yerself Bridget."
antoman | Aug 25, 2011, 12:43 PM EDT
Senator John McCain done something that is every Irishmans greatest desire or dream. He married a woman that owns a brewery.
iamdiva | Aug 25, 2011, 12:30 PM EDT
I love Irish culture more than anything. When I hear the accent, it makes me think of the heritage. Don't get me wrong, it's become a new 'fad' now to like Irishmen in the US, but when it comes down to it, I think we admire the Irish because they are family orientated people. Not many Americans are now a days and it is sad.
Searlit | Aug 25, 2011, 12:29 PM EDT
I guess it's the same in the US, then. Got to protect your reputation, even if you're DOA. :-)
antoman | Aug 25, 2011, 11:52 AM EDT
@Searlit- Apparently the first thing doctors do here on receiving a traffic accident victim. Is to check and see if the individuals underpants are clean.
lad1912 | Aug 25, 2011, 11:40 AM EDT
Are you kidding - I have yet to meet an unattractive Irishman - and that brogue is like catnip to us American women. Irishmen know how to treat a woman like a woman unlike American men who treat us like....commodities.
Searlit | Aug 25, 2011, 10:57 AM EDT
That's true Antoman, girls were taught to wear clean underwear by Mommy, as well. Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha!
NGrandquis | Aug 25, 2011, 09:42 AM EDT
No surprise...Irishmen like to make love and are good at it so what's not to like?
antoman | Aug 25, 2011, 07:42 AM EDT
Women like clean underpants on a bloke and that's something us Irish excel at. Sure twas instilled in us by the mammy at a very young age in case we got knocked down by a car going to the shop.