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Michael O'Leary

Ryanair’s manic Michael O’Leary in his own words

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Michael O'Leary

Michael O’Leary, the Chief Executive of Europe’s largest low-fare airline, Ryanair has become a legend in his own lifetime for his in your face tactics and controversial comments. A new book ‘The Little Book of Mick’ captures his wit and wisdom.

Here he is in his own words:

On plane cancelations
"If a plane is canceled will we put you up in an hotel overnight? Absolutely not. If a plane is delayed will we give you a voucher for a restaurant absolutely not.”

On refunds for canceled flights
"What part of No Refund do you not understand? You are not getting a refund, so f… off."

On apologizing
"Are we going to apologize when something goes wrong? Now we’re f.. not. Please understand it does not matter how many times you write to us."

On popularity
"I don’t give a shite if nobody likes me."

On his transatlantic plans
"Our transatlantic service working title is. Beds and Blowjobs  $10 in economy and  a fantastic Beds and Blowjobs service in business."

On new UK security measures:
"It feels like Laurel and bloody Hardy are working at the Department of Transport, coming up with these security measures. The western world is not in danger from lethal toiletries."

On British Airways:
"On British Airways your luggage will travel further than you will."

On flying:
"Are we trying to blow up the notion that flying is some kind of orgasmic experience rather than a glorified bus service? Yes, we are. An airplane is nothing more than a bus with wings on."

On funeral-goers being Ryanair’s most profitable passengers:
"They tend to book late because they don’t tend to have much notice, and they tend to be price-insensitive because they have to travel."

On Ryanair flights:

"If you want a quiet flight, use another airline. Our flights are noisy, full and we are always trying to sell you something."

On pricing:
"No we shouldn’t give you a bloody cup of coffee. We only charge 19 Euro for the ticket."

On no-refunds:
"We don’t fall over ourselves if you say, ‘My granny fell ill.’ What part of ‘no-refunds’ don’t you understand.’

On Dublin airport:
"When it comes to car parking, in Dublin Airport some of the car parks are closer to County Kildare than they are to the airport itself."

On publicity:
"You’ve got to keep people interested. We specialize in cheap publicity stunts."

On his love life:
‘I’d love to spend the rest of my life on a beach in Barbados with a load of babes, but I’m striking out badly on that front.’

On competition:
‘Kenneth Williams had it right: Infamy, infamy, they all have it f@@king in for me.”

 On whether his successor will be Irish:
‘Much more likely a ghastly, emollient Englishman, probably with a knighthood: Sir Rodger Mucknsmuck.’
 

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