Dear MTN, I am a 45 year old professional woman. I have never been married and all of my serious relationships seem to fall apart fast. I am looking for a professional, educated man that is my age or younger than I am. I have a very exact idea of the kind of man I am looking for. He is tall-6 foot or more. He has dark hair and green eyes. He is also professional and has never been married and does not have kids. I would imagine him as never being married because he has devoted his life to his career, and now he is looking for love and is willing to cut his hours being that he is so successful. I want a man that appreciates art, theater and literature. I want a man I can have an intellectual conversation with. Is this all too much to ask for? I feel that I am a great catch and I shouldn't have to settle. I would rather be alone then settle for anything less than what I am looking for. Some of my friends say I'm crazy and my "dream man" doesn't exist and that I'm being too picky. Maureen, what do you think? - Sue Sue, Well you sure have taken the time to find out what you truly want in a man. Keep in mind, a man who is as great as this on paper, may be totally different in person. You might short-change yourself if you only stick to this stringent list. You also didn't mention if you wish to have children or if the man should want them. I think it's good that you are prepared for what you want should he just appear in front of you one day, however, I think you need to be more flexible with yourself and your desires, as well as the mans. When you take out the "list" part of this, and just be yourself and see who comes into your life, you might be surprised that some of these requirements aren't as important as you thought they were. If you are serious about only using this list, you really do need to use a Matchmaker to shift through all the potentials out there for you and do the screening for you. It would take you 20 years to do this all on your own. Good luck. - MTN Dear MTN, I am currently dating a really great guy that a friend set me up with. I think he is really nice and very handsome but there is something about him that I am just not "feeling." He has a very strong personality and sometimes I feel like I am just not smart enough for him. He has been to all of these great places and seen all of these great things and I just feel so plain and regular next to him. I don't want to hurt my friend's feelings, the friend who set us up, but I just don't know if he is right for me. I don't know how to explain it to her and I don't want to sound like I am being ridiculous, but I just don't know what to do! - Teri Dear Teri, You can't and shouldn't live your life feeling like your second best with the person your in love with. You must be compatible for a relationship to work and last. Unfortunately, you have made it quite obvious by your own feelings (whether they are true or not), that he is just not compatible to you. My advice though is to bring this up to him. See his reaction. He might have just been trying to impress you and is more down to earth than you think. - MTN Dear MTN, There are so many different kinds of services out there. There is the internet, there is speed dating, there are these singles events and dances, there are matchmakers, there are so many options. I feel overwhelmed by all these different choices one can use to find someone. I'm sure everyone has one specific service that is best for them but I just don't know how someone decides which service is right for them? Do you have any words of wisdom? - Jim Dear Jim, Please forget the Internet. It is a waste of time over 90% of the time. Life is too short to waste it with people who are using the internet and don't know what they are looking for yet. The others you mentioned are basically like using the bar scene, and we all know that is not the best way to find Mrs. Right. If you use a Matchmaker, like I am, then you must do your research. If photos are important to you to see before you meet the person, then I am the only Matchmaker that shows them. However, if you are going to consider my service, please note, I am only for clients that are committment minded. If you are, call me for a complimentary consultation. If you aren't ready yet, and still like all the "games" that take place with dating, then another Matchmaker will be better for you. Keep in mind, however, I am also the most affordable Matchmaker out there. So do your homework and decide what you want. Best of luck! - MTN Please send in your questions to Mtnelson@optonline.net. Maureen Tara Nelson Private Matchmaking, Inc. 1-888-31-MATCH